Who am I?

I’m still trying to find my voice.

Who am I? Who do I want to be?

What is it I want out of life? How do I get there?

I don’t have it all figured out…and that’s okay.

I’ve found myself questioning a lot these days. Post-grad life will do that. Only thing is I’ve been “post-grad” for almost a year now. At what point can I no longer use the excuse that I’m “still figuring it out” and at what point do people stop letting me?

Maybe it’s not simple.

I don’t think there’s ever going to be a magical day when I wake up and have it all figured out. That this is what I want out of life, and this is how I’m going to get there. Will I ever wake up and think who I am right now is who I want to be?

I think life is meant to change and people are supposed to change along with it.

I’m not the same person I was a year ago. I’m not even the same person I was a few months ago. I’m constantly evolving. Trying to better myself. Trying to figure out, as cliche as it sounds, my purpose.

Happiness is something constantly being sought after, but never fully attained.

I choose to be happy right here, right now, and in this moment. I choose to be happy with who I am right now because I’m alive today and I’m happy to be alive today. Something I couldn’t always say.

I don’t have all the answers. I don’t even want to have all the answers. But I talk a lot to the God who does, and it gives me peace to know there is someone above who listens and has a plan even when I don’t have a clue what to do.

Everyone is trying to write their own story. But what if it’s already been written? Maybe it’s our job to figure out the narrative.

I’m still trying to find my voice.

Who am I as a writer? As a reader? As a person?

Am I enough?

No. I’m not enough alone. But I’m not alone. And that’s a relief. With God on my side I can do anything. Be anything. Become the person He made me to be.

Instead of asking myself what I want out of life, I should be asking what God wants for my life.

And then ask Him to show me the way.

faith life personal essay self-reflection

Rachel Writes View All →

Hi! My name is Rachel. I love to write. Write about life, love, and reflect on how the past builds the future. Mostly, I love to tell stories because I believe there is something about stories that brings the world closer together. You can check out some of my writing reflections here at Rachel Writes.

4 Comments Leave a comment

  1. I love this post. I connected to every word – I’m constantly trying to figure out life and find my purpose in life. But sometimes I just need to remind myself to have faith and trust that God has a plan for me. I came across a quote when reading a the book, Cutting for Stone, by Abraham Verghese. It’s one of my favorites. “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.”
    He has a plan for us. He made each of us special and unique for a reason. We just have to have faith and trust.
    Your post was beautiful.

    Like

  2. Hi Rachel, I’m enjoying your writing! It’s funny you should say “I’m not enough…” I used to say that all the time. Then one morning on the way to school, God hit me upside the head with a proverbial brick –I am enough, because HE is enough!– Ask long as I have him living inside me, I’m enough to handle any situation or problem because I’m tapped into the source! The source of all wisdom, and of all potential; of all compassion and love when I think I’ve run out. If I ever get disconnected from Him, then no I would not be enough, but as long as I stay plugged in to the Almighty, I AM. 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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