It’s not a bad thing to be single. My purpose is not tied to my relationship status. I’m single and not sad about it.
Oh but how can I possibly live without someone to love and someone to love me?
Here’s the thing.
I am loved.
By my friends, my family…my dog.
And that’s not sad, or pathetic, or like “how do I go on without that someone special,” but maybe commendable that I’m not desperate to let just anybody in to my life.
I have a life outside of whether or not I have a boyfriend. My worth isn’t tied to my relationship status.
Being single is not a blessing or a curse. It just is what it is. Not a bad thing or a good thing, just where I am in life.
I feel like society makes it seem like the meaning of life is tied to love. And don’t get me wrong, love is important, but when it comes to romance, it’s not everything.
I feel like sometimes people put their worth in others. Then when that relationship doesn’t work out, it hurts more because they didn’t just lose a person they cared about, but they lost a piece of their identity.
And I don’t want to ever wake up to find that I’ve lost myself to someone.
I realize this may sound petty, and may not be well received by everyone. The truth is, I may not know what I’m talking about. This is just my personal opinion so take it with a grain of salt.
I don’t want to date because I’m bored, or I need someone to validate me, or that I just want to be in a relationship because I can’t handle being alone.
I’m not bored, I’m confident in myself, and I have no problem being alone.
It isn’t just about dating to date because it’s not hard to find someone to go on a date with. These days, one swipe right is all it takes, really.
But it’s about the reasons behind. If I wasn’t confident in myself, how can I be confident when someone loves, but then leaves? I have to be strong on my own. Because my happiness, my worth, my life, can’t be tied to another person if I’m not happy alone. If the relationship doesn’t work out, then I lose more than just someone I cared for, I lose a piece of me.
I’m not trying to over romanticize dating because I know it’s possible to date without it having to be serious. But I don’t want to just “date to date.”
I want to date because I’m ready to potentially find someone, because I’m genuinely interested in someone, and while I’m not saying “date with the intention of marriage,” I don’t want to necessarily date without that intention either. If I couldn’t see myself with someone in the future, then what’s the point?
In today’s world, it’s easy to think lightly of dating and relationships. It can also be confusing because there is so much underlying a text, or what does it mean to “hang out” versus “date” and honestly the lines are blurred and I don’t have a clue what anything means. It feels like it’s all a game.
I’m not into playing games. It doesn’t make sense to me. I am who I am and I’ll be blatant about where I stand and how I feel, and that’s not for everyone. But it will be for someone. When the time is right.
I’m not afraid to be single because I know I won’t be forever. I know I’m just waiting for the right person.
And that’s not sad or pathetic, but rather I have the confidence to say that I’m not going to settle for anything less than what I deserve.
And I’m strong enough on my own that I don’t need another person to make me feel whole.
Hi! My name is Rachel. I love to write. Write about life, love, and reflect on how the past builds the future. Mostly, I love to tell stories because I believe there is something about stories that brings the world closer together. You can check out some of my writing reflections here at Rachel Writes.